26 Years & Window to my Soul

A new season and era upon every year. One year older, wiser, and more refined…and of course, always keeping it interesting. What will I do with the next 25, should I be so lucky to experience?  Become a difference maker? Make an impact?  Hopefully, doing so in the most selfless way possible…that feels like a respectable goal. 

The first 25 were all about self-discovery, much of that discovery coming to fruition in the most recent couple of years. Although self-discovery is never ending, the focus feels that it can begin to shift away from predominantly,  “who am I?” to possibly,  “what can I do for others?”, or on an even bigger scale, “how can I change the world?”. To say in plain writing that you aim to change the world feels bold, because it inevitably is, but to limit our ability simply because we are afraid to say what we want, that would just be foolish. 

So, how do we change the world? I can tell you where I am personally beginning, with the goal to share my focus areas of improvement and hopefully shed light and create a stir to reflect on your own, knowing full well that we may come from vastly different realities. 

Humility

What does it mean to be humble? Well, by definition, humility is to have a “modest view of one’s own importance” (Oxford Languages, 2024). I believe this to be different than downplaying accomplishments, minimizing goals, and/or underselling what you can do. True humility, to me, is recognizing that others may understand more than we do.

This is an area of weakness for me; I am headstrong and often believe I know best, have more expertise, and would “do it better”, whatever “it” is. Far from the truth. So what will the next year be about? Challenging self, challenging beliefs, and most importantly, seeking to understand rather than to gain data to prove my own points. This inherently leads us to the art of listening.

Listening

I am notoriously a bad listener- oftentimes trying to complete anothers’ sentence as they are speaking (as if I know what they are about to say). Sometimes I am accurate, and even more often I am extremely off-base, which creates a riff between myself and the person speaking. 

Humility is the awareness allowing us to recognize that another person may know more. Listening is the practice. 

“The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice” - Proverbs 12:15


What better way to begin the task of changing the world, than to first understand the task at hand? 

Controlling reactivity

Last and finally, and my personal favorite- controlling reactivity. This has been an area of criticism for me in the past, of which has greatly improved over the years, with much work to come in the future. 
Alongside listening, controlling reactivity is simply allowing some words and actions to pass, truly thinking before facilitating a response. This proves to be difficult to me, as a person with extreme impulse, and a fighting mentality. 

How do we control reactivity? By deep breathing? Going for a run? This is a daunting task, especially in the heat of a vigorous argument, or when faced with a topic that sparks great emotion within us. Challenge accepted - though I accept that I may, and inevitably will, fail. The goal is to get a handle on things, and recognize that the best things take time. 

How will you change the world? 

The world is unfathomably large, but our personal worlds are small. As we all know, anything which is now large had to begin somewhere small. I believe that focusing on our own “how” rather than the “what” and “when” will keep us present, as well as aligned on vision rather than outcome alone. 

It’s my birthday tomorrow, which has clearly sparked some form of just-post-quarter-life reflection, but hopefully this reaches an audience who also wants to change, difference-make, and accept that though our outcomes will not be perfect, we strive to change the world. 

I challenge whoever reading this to focus on your own areas which are currently displeasing to you, the things you may hide from yourself, and the things you are unwilling to see because of the pain it may cause when acknowledging. 

If we shed a light on those demons, they can be addressed and slowly sworn off. Frightening as it may, I believe this to be where we can start changing the world.

Thank you for your support in reading. I value you greatly. Friends, fans, family, and people who hate my guts, I wish you well. Go change the world.

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